Archive for the Egyptian Vacation Category


Posted in Egyptian Vacation, Isabald Monteclaire, Uncategorized on February 12, 2010 by applecorecomics

Hello.  My name’s Isabald Monteclaire.  I’m doing this as a favor to Gloria.  He left sometime this morning.  He made the post already.  Here it is:

4:23 AM to 4:50 AM

Forgive any typoszz we’re ina caravann and ti’s really bujmpy .  Ii actuallly left  around midnight last…oh good, we stopped…last night and we’ve already arrived in Egypt (we rode in a small plane, trust me it’s faster).  For anyone not sure what I’m talking about or why Isabald introduced this blog, quick rundown:

in 1983 I was a part of an excavation in Egypt searching for a lost treasure.  My team was racing to find it against another excavation team, headed by Philip IV of France.  The treasure was never found, and now both our teams are headed to Egypt to be the first to find, once and for all, the missing…well, I’ll tell you what it is when my team finds it (more details and pictures in a few blogs down).

Philip gathered some shady characters for his team this time around.  I, on the other hand, believe in fair play.  Nah, I’m just kidding.  I brought the horny ghost from my attic with me.  He can go through fucking walls and shit.  Seriously.  He walks in on me in the bathroom all the time.  Him and my old team from back in the day with me leading?  We’re gonna kick so much ass.  I’ll have lots of pictures and stuff over the next two weeks.  Isabald will post them when I send them, mostly because I promised him he can have the blog every Wednesday when I get back to..I don’t know, get things off his chest I guess.  It’s not easy being a rich bastard these days.  Anyways, the caaravan’s sttarting baack up now.  Oh, I alm ost frogot, Gold andn jBlue and Gray and Fantasstic Benefits are going to update midnight-ish tonight.  Isabald ssshould postt something gtto go along withh  it .    God damn itt it’s hott.

Look forward to talking with you all.  Monteclaire out.


Thurs- 1:09 AM to 1:20 AM

Posted in Egyptian Vacation, Uncategorized on February 11, 2010 by applecorecomics

Pssss…..hey……HEY! I can’t talk long.  I’m sorry I didn’t post earlier but something’s up.  What?  You can’t hear me?  That’s because I’m whispering you dolt.  See, I’ve been tracked down by Philip IV (see a couple blogs ago) so I had to go into hiding.  It’s kind of weird, though…I had to hide in my attic.  Problem is, that’s where the ghost who has a thing for me stays.  He said I could stay too, then winked at me, and the walls started bleeding.  I’m not sure, but I think in ghost talk that means he’s horny.  You know, like in manga when a dude’s horny his nose bleeds…ssshhh, I hear Philip…………What’s he saying?….Oh…shit, they’re leaving early.  They know we’re headed to Egypt Saturday, so they’re leaving Friday.

Damn.  I can’t leave tomorrow, I promised the ghost I’d play poltergeist (again, I don’t know what that means).  It looks like I’m gonna have to move the schedule forward a bit and leave Friday.  I don’t think Philip’s using the same excavation crew as last time, either.  I swear I saw the whole cast of Skeletor’s clan from the movie Masters of the Universewalking behind him. You know, the little guy with the hook and I think a lizard, a hot chick, and some robot or something.  This guy’s good.  Hey, maybe I can bring the ghost.  That should even the odds.  I have to go now, the ghost keeps motioning towards his movie collection.  I see...”Lost In Translation“…huh, I figured he’d have a problem with Bill Murray.

Fri- 3:50 PM to 4:13 PM

Posted in Egyptian Vacation, Uncategorized on February 5, 2010 by applecorecomics

Here’s me back in 1982 in the Egyptian Desert:

There I am waving.  That’s the hut we stayed in.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about that excavation and how we left it…unfinished.    Sorry I can’t go into more details at the moment, but the very same team we were racing against to unearth the…whew, almost gave it away.  I meant the team we were racing against is now preparing to go back, just like we are.  Don’t worry, there isn’t anything dramatic about what we’re searching for.  No fate of the world crap, just that it’s worth lots of cold hard cash. And it’s really not what you’re thinking at all.  I mean, I’m only guessing, but you probably might imagine it’s some Egyptian artifact like in the beginning of “The Exorcist” when the old guy finds the small statue of the wind god.  I guess I’ll just let your imaginations run wild for now.  I swear I’ll send postcards and keep you updated on exactly what’s happening.

I’ve blocked the whole opposing excavation team from reading this blog, so I can safely tell you that I’m planning on sneaking into their camp and sabotaging them somehow.  I know, I know, that sounds mean and dirty.  But you’d understand if you knew who the others and I were dealing with.  Let’s just say it’s somebody from the old days. I don’t want to name names, but he is the one who disbanded and kind of hunted down my old crew (you know, Knights Templar, and all that.) Well, cat’s out of the bag now.  That’s right, the leader of the other excavation team is none other than Philip IV of France.

“Philip the Fair,” psssshhhh

Anyway, I fear I’ve said too much already.  Again I won’t be leaving until Saturday, Feb 13th.  At that time my cousin Isabald Monteclaire will be taking over posting duties until I get back.  I’ll be sending him updates to show you, so somebody contact me if he’s not (I’ll be checking my email, I’m pretty sure there’s a pyramid with wi-fi I can connect to over there.  Contact info is in the menu on the right).  I’m not sure the length of this “vacation,” but you better be sure I’ll stay as long as it takes (or after two weeks is up, whichever comes first).

And of course go look at the latest Gold and Blue and Gray update.  The prologue is nearing its end, which of course is actually the start.  Of Chapter 1.  At that point.  And if you haven’t already checked out Fantastic Benefits (all these accessible by clicking the HOME link in the menu on the right) do so now, because it’s going to get pretty good.  I’m tellin’ you.